This is my partner’s question every weekend, and I always answer him in the same way: I smile. In fact, the other day I dared to say that I don’t think we’ll get to relax at the weekend for at least the next ten years. The fact is that my partner’s concept of a relaxing weekend belongs to the past, to the world of single guys and people who control their own time. He already knows this, but he still feels that we can do something about it, that we can change our fate, whereas me – I’ve given up.
Our typical weekend starts at 7 in the morning with breakfast, preparing food for everybody and getting ready to go out. Where to? It doesn’t matter. The goal is to leave the house, enjoy some fresh air and meet some friends, because let’s face it, a toddler is hard work, and when you’re with him most of the time during the week you just want to go out and do something different.
We’ve created a new strategy. Every Friday we call a different friend and try to catch up with them at their place or at ours. These social activities are hard work: we end up dashing out of the house and returning exhausted (not to mention our patient friends who do the hosting at their places). Sometimes I wonder what the point of our weekends is. Generally the best time is when my partner is driving and we enjoy 15-20 minutes of quiet. I wonder, during these peaceful moments, why we keep on doing this every weekend instead of just lying on the sofa and letting the time go by.
The reason is simple and appalling: because I feel trapped and decadent at home, especially if I don’t see any other adults. I rush out every weekend to see the world, to meet other people, to share our toddler’s amazing energy with our friends. But the funniest thing is that we fill our weekends with activities hoping that by doing this we will be relaxed at the end of the day. So maybe the next time my partner asks me when we’re going to relax at the weekend, I should reply: “Whenever I dare to feel decadent”.